"I'll Give You Somethin' to Cry ABOUT!"

As corny as some of these sound, the concept makes perfect sense. Part of our interaction with children is to teach by SHOWING them how to effectively communicate as we teach them other life lessons, manners, etc.

We have to start treating them as young "people" because well, they are. 

If we wouldn't allow other adults to speak to us so harshly, why should we do the same to mere children?

Furthermore, the age old adage that "children should be seen, not heard" needs to be put to rest. We teach children the importance of timing and tact, key elements in healthy communication and building healthy relationships, when we allow them to speak their minds and express themselves. This also aids in healthy emotional/psychological development. No one likes to be "shut down" every time they attempt to share how they feel/what they think. 

Of course there will always be exceptions based on specific children and situations but keep this thinking in mind the next time you speak to a child.

Really, taking this approach and working to be patient enough to ask our youth questions about their behavior/feelings helps to improve their comprehension and enables them to be able to think for themselves and adequately convey what they're feeling.

I tell children (and teens) all the time, "use your words" and "I need you to be able to tell me WHY you feel the way you feel or WHY you're behaving in this way".

When I was growing up, "I dunno" was NOT an acceptable answer!

#WordsMatter #BeInspired #BEInspiredAsIAMInspired#LightBegetsLight #WeBeTheLight

Plucking Fruit - What Do You Bear?

"One's failure to love | Is a tree which yields no fruit | Leaving all hearts starved" 

  Heart of a Queen - Poetry and Prose from the Soul, 

© 2013 Write Right Publications

We've all heard it countless times. From our mother and auntie to girlfriends and co-workers and some of us, have even uttered the words ourselves.

"Oh my goodness! He is plucking my last nerve!?"

In those moments when we find ourselves utterly annoyed or aghast at someone's behavior, it is easy to give them control over our emotions, lending our last slice of peace.

Lord forbid we "wake up on the wrong side of the bed", then every little thing rubs us the wrong way as we project negative energy on any and everybody who crosses our path.

So, what are we to do about these nuances? Are we to give every person who plucks our nerves a piece of our mind or...

...maybe if we change what we make available for plucking.

Think of it like this: If we are the branches that were created to bear fruit, we have to be mindful of what fruit we're bearing.

If the Fruit of the Spirit are "love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control" then, why is it that our nerves are so easily exposed?

If we learn to consistently take the time to consume those same wonderfully nutrient rich fruits daily, we will find that our FRUIT is being plucked instead of our nerves.

This is not to be unrealistic. It is only natural for life's dramas and all the players in it to potentially frustrate us to a certain level of aggravation. But what does being quick to speak and react do for a situation?

A change of perspective can make all the difference. Although our emotions are real, we must not be ruled by them. When those moments in life arise, stop and ask yourself, "what fruit am I bearing?"

A Stone's Throw

When we look at the history of human nature, we find that morals are taught…or not. Even when standards of traditional morality are ingrained into our psyche, it is only a matter of time before something or someone comes along causing us to question what's right and what's wrong. Such doubt knocks us off of the safety of our high horse, sending us plummeting down into a depth of emotions and insecurities only held by us mere mortals.

Ego and pride sit in, clouding our vision and our judgment, often leading us to dig holes so deep that nothing or no one but the grace of God can lift us out…

None of us know the true reasons why a person does the things they do. Although it would appear that most behaviors are acted upon out of arrogance, that’s rarely the case. Even when arrogance manifests itself, it’s generally rooted in a greater issue; a lack of confidence, knowledge of self and limited self-worth.

All things considered, we must learn to be more gracious when it comes to the failures and sins of our brothers and sisters. With the increase in social media and ease of graphic design, it is easier than ever to “call out” those who are in the wrong. What we fail to consider is that at any moment, our own discrepancies could land us on the chopping block for all to see, criticize and judge.  

I personally have never been one for "outing" anyone, adding to or spreading already ousted information. I'm of the thought that people will suffer enough with the original outing of a particular offense. Some encounter familial disgrace, others financial collapse and others still, a combination of multiple instances of discomfiture.

From international pop stars to local celebrities, right on down to the average Joe, it’s easy to point our fingers, declaring how “low down” another is. On Twitter, Instagram and everywhere else across the interwebs we, as a generation, add our own commentary in public forums. As entertaining and amusing as this behavior can be when the shoe is not on our feet, it doesn't aid in providing a remedy for the situation or aid in the growth or rebuilding of the person(s) involved.

I also have my own issues that could very well make for a good "talk of the town" at any point in my life. We all do. And THIS is important to remember while we seek to condemn one based on our immediate opinion of them and their words/actions.

We are all but a stone’s throw away from condemnation.

A Name is More Than Just a Name: Nina = Grace (Hebrew)

I am finally glad that God made me the type of person to be a friend to people even when they're don't act like friends to me. Growing up, my being gracious made me feel weak & vulnerable. Although I am a "social butterfly", I oftentimes found myself hurt & feeling alone.

As a woman growing in God's will, I understand the importance of being that gracious person. I understand the freedom that comes from extending grace to those whom I call friend. Even more importantly, I thank God that people know that they can depend on me no matter what.

I've grown to understand that sometimes, people don't really know how to be real friends because they too have been hurt and instead of loving harder, they keep people at a distance, they hurt others, adopting the concept of "misery loves company". Even still, sometimes, people don't recognize they're even hurting you.

And so, to those who have called me friend over the years but have shown me less than the love they say they have, it's okay...*smiling at God* ...don't see me as weak. I am far from lonely. And even though the actions of others still hurts at times, I have all that I need. Most importantly, I have the grace of God & His love in my heart that allows me to pour the same grace & love onto others who have need...

With all of that being said: I♥YOU

Your friend,

Nina