Hear My Call - Standing On the Word

Lord, I thank You for Your word and I stand on that word knowing that You began a good work in me and that You will see it through to the end, to perfection. Philippians 1:6


I only want you glorified in all that I do. As I seek to glorify You, this releases from me any pressure to complete anything by my own strength. I know that I am nothing without You, my Creator, my Redeemer. John 14:13


May Your Light continue to shine through me, even when my natural eyes can't see the path illuminated before me because of doubt. Forgive me Lord for even allowing that doubt to begin to consume my mind. Matthew 5:14-16


Right now, I cast away worry, grief, doubt, every insecurity, every feeling of inadequacy and stand in Your presence giving thanks for being the loving, gracious God that You are. Mark 11:23


May others see Your goodness and love through this very situation at this very moment, may You be glorified. *exhales* ^_^

The Mary and Martha Within

I have been stressed.

Like, so stressed that the details of what the stress has been doing to my physical body is TMI. Lol

I have cried. Cried some more...laughed hysterically until tears overwhelmed me yet again...lost sleep, all because of my stress when it comes to what I know to be the will of God.  My life as a first time author has been exciting and exhilarating yet more stressful than even planning my own wedding just four short years ago.

God has not only provided me with awesome words to share my story, with the world but He's also surrounded this whole project with a collective of individuals who are dedicated to make this experience a great one.  I have still had to do quite a bit on my own but the parts that were out of my hands made the process more stressful than I expected.

But if I have such an amazing team of people working with me to bring 'Dramas of a Bald Head Queen' to fruition, why the stress?  If I trust the connections to truly be divine, why not trust in the Divine One who established said connections to complete the work He began in me so long ago?

Just this morning, I awoke to more doubtful and wearied thoughts.  I found myself getting angry and frustrated again with...myself.

God immediately reminded me that, in order to truly rest in Him, I must place myself in the posture of worshiper.  Even as a servant seeking to do the "greater good", bringing glory to God in the things I do and in walking according to His will, I have failed to walk in that part of servitude where I consciously worship.

Often times when we think of the story of Mary and Martha (Luke 10:38-42), we are able to point the finger at other individuals who we see in church or in our respective ministries who are doing "too much" yet, not enough.  God showed me this morning that this conflict has risen within me, one individual torn between walking in God's will and sitting and taking time to worship.

THIS is where my stress has come from and today, I release it and seek to worship God wholly trusting that the things He's called me to do will be done according to His will and the purpose He's called me to.

So, there are two words for today 1) balance and 2) worship.

We worship God in many ways.  We worship by serving, the giving of our time, talents, ultimately and by walking in obedience.  In this world, we need to find a balance between doing {for God} and being {with God}.

Today Lord, I worship You with my heart, with my presence, with my communion with You. I love You and release the stresses that are present only in my mind and rest in You.  Amen. *BEAM*

$1150 Testimony - Priceless

The other day I had lunch with my friend and event planner to continue confirming plans to celebrate the release of my first book, 'Dramas of a Bald Head Queen'I told her how this whole process feels similar to the energy and process of planning my wedding. I also shared with her the story about how the Lord literally handed me $1150 cash just weeks before my wedding day.

I was living in a dormitory on campus at Hampton University where I was then working as a residence hall director. Since I didn't sign up to work that summer, I was off but my building was still being used to house special groups for weeks at a time during the summer.

We still had to buy last minute odds and ends, pay the caterer and pay the Magnolia House Inn where we had arranged to stay our wedding night. Raphael and I remained prayerful and relaxed trusting that we had done everything we knew to do.  We are both tithers/givers and in doing so, stand EXPECTING God to do what His Word says.  We stood trusting that He would do as He said He would and did a pretty good job at not doubting.

So, three weeks before the wedding a group of 50 or so youth and 6-8 Chaperones from the Eastern Shore of Virginia came to stay in my building. Things were quiet the four days they were there and after they turned in keys and departed, I simply had to go through and do a sweep of the building, opening the doors of the rooms they occupied so that housekeeping could come in to clean.

After getting to the third closed door, I use my master key to unlock it, briefly glancing in the room when I noticed something on one of the beds. I entered the room to find...sitting there, neatly and untouched in the middle of the bed, a stack of money. Ten $100 bills and three $50. 

*PAUSE*

I quickly put the money in my pocket and headed back to my apartment to call Raphael. I knew that no one had been in the building since the group left so we decided to hold on to the money so none of the housekeepers could try to claim it as theirs. Thinking that one of the adults maybe left the money by accident (in no envelop, in an EMPTY room...?) I put a sign on my office door "If you were with *group name* and left anything behind, please call me at..." 

No one ever came. No one ever called. 

I contacted the special events office on campus to inquire as to whether anyone from the group contacted them to report anything lost. Nothing.

We waited a full seven days deciding to pay our tithes and keep it moving! Lol

$1150 CASH. Seemingly out of the blue.

That was just four short years ago and although I don't expect God to move in the exact same way, I have no doubt that He will bring the vision for this event to pass, just as He did with my wedding!

*BEAM*

What's Next Is Now

Monday, June 4, 2012 Happiness is here now, today. Live it. The possibilities for greater and greater fulfillment are immense and amazing. Explore them, and claim the best for your own by acting on them now. If there’s something you’ve been meaning to do, now is the time to get moving. If you’ve been wanting a change for the better, now is when you can make that change happen. Your dreams and desires are real and alive in this moment. Use this time to follow where they lead. Your unique and priceless journey has brought you now to this point. Pay sincere tribute to all that rich experience by making meaningful use of it on this day. Happiness and joy and fulfillment are now yours. Live them today in your own special way. — Ralph Marston I like to say, "What's next is now."  And it's true.  We spend so much time planning for the future and get so wrapped up in our planning that we feel like it will never happen.  We have to come to the realization that what we do NOW is in preparation for what's NEXT and treat our every move as if what's NEXT is RIGHT NOW.

Quiet, My Clamorous Mind

This morning I was reminded of why it is important to pray before turning to sleep for the night. As long as we're alive, our mind is constantly working. Doubt, fear and disbelief hit me hard while I sleep. These things creep in when I'm not consciously able to confront them with the Word or awake to declare the promises of God.

Too many times I've awaken out of my slumber to find myself overwhelmed with worry. This is why the Word MUST BE IN US and we must seek to dwell on it day and night.

We must meditate on His Word and the promises within so that even in our sleep, we worship and God can/will be magnified in our hearts and minds.

PRAYING WITHOUT CEASING is real and NECESSARY in the life of the believer! Align your spirit with that of God and peace will sustain you, even while you sleep. ^_^

Today Is When

Wednesday, May 30, 2012 Today is when your life is happening. Now is when life’s opportunities are yours. Within you is a dream, a longing, a purpose, a desire to experience life’s richness in your own unique way. Surrounding you is a universe filled with energy and abundance, and possibilities. Now is when you have the opportunity to connect your most treasured dreams with that abundance, and to bring them to life. Focused, purposeful, inspired action is how you can most effectively do so. On this day, in this moment, the possibilities are more than just intellectual curiosities. Right now, the possibilities are real. Today you can choose, you can take action, you can make a difference and you can make real, satisfying, lasting progress. Today you have the priceless opportunity to live your life as you envision it. The best life you can imagine is today within your grasp. So go beyond mere imagining, and live each moment in the direction of the very best you know life can be. — Ralph Marston The words above are one of those "right on time" posts.  An email sent to me from a friend. Although I was included as part of her daily mass email, receiving this one is like sitting in church with a thousand other people but feeling like the preacher is speaking directly to you. This goes beyond assumed fortune cookie type coincidence, not that I believe that anything is by happenstance or coincidence but this truly spoke to me. Recently being bombarded with feelings of inadequacies and doubts I have come to the realization (again perhaps...) that I have a terrible habit of limiting myself in an attempt to avoid disappointment. I'm certain that I'm not alone in my feelings but I don't want anyone to live according to the limitations of doubt and fear. In order to truly experience the full manifestation of the promises of God, we have to overcome our uncertainties. Our confidence in God comes when we truly seek to live according to His will for our lives. Today, I choose...faith.

Much Is Given

Although gaining financial wealth has always been a driving force in prosperity, I have personally seen a recent rise in the number of people who seem to be pushing towards making a dream come true for the sake of fortune and fame.

I have found myself growing weary of supporting people I see hustling their talents for money.  Even as indie artists, it’s possible to pimp oneself just as much as industry execs.  Many who have been driven by the need to make money off of their vision without understanding the greater purpose in creating have found that their hasty efforts were in vain often rushing projects to get them in the hands of whomever they think will be interested and in turn, putting out mediocre work! 

Putting out a product, be it a CD, book, a piece of fine art or even a service without ensuring it’s your best work is not only a waste money, time and energy but can also potentially tarnish the name/brand that you worked “so hard” at establishing.  Then when the product doesn’t gain popularity as hoped, people will scream that “people don’t support their own!”  Well, who do YOU know wants to endorse mess!?

I am learning that there will always be people who are willing to support your vision.  The key is actually having a vision and not just an idea!  Many don’t know the difference between the two!!!

This behavior is especially troubling when I see it displayed by those who consider themselves to be believers of Christ.  Lord knows that the current condition of the economy has people seeking to create multiple streams of income to support themselves and their families but our inability to focus on the will of God for our gifts/talents/ministry is merely tossing our seeds about which never generates a fruitful harvest. 

“A farmer went out to sow his seed. ⁴ As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. ⁵ Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. ⁶ But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. ⁷ Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. ⁸ Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop…” Matthew 13:4-8

I have been asked me why I do so many speaking engagements/gigs for free.  The answer is simple:  I give much because much as been given TO me. My talents, time and energy all serve a purpose greater than me. I dare not do what I do with the mere goal of making money.  I seek to fulfill my God given purpose and in doing so, KNOW and EXPECT that prosperity/wealth WELL BEYOND MONEY will come to me and my family.

If your "grind" has you focused on "making it" or "making money", you need to readjust your focus on PURPOSE.  Your gift will truly make room for you but we must “…seek ye first the Kingdom of God…” Y’all know how it goes!

One day (soon possibly), I'll get paid for all that I do but for now, the bank of my heart is filled with gratitude that God sees fit to use ME at all!  The payoff I receive from knowing that people are blessed by my words and even my presence is greater than the checks that will come!

“For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.” Luke 12:48