#ThrowbackThursday - The Habit of Disappointment

From the archive: 1/30/11 - I woke up feeling quite disappointed in myself. From my excessive use of blue cheese dressing to my failure to write consistently, I've been slippin'...

Layered in between the blue cheese and my loss of significant use of words you can find too much sleep and not enough prayer. Over-eating and lack of cardio...

It is believed that it takes 21 days to form a new habit - whether that habit be good or bad. I have found this to be true, which is why it is detrimental to our continued growth that we not "wait til Monday" to go back to the gym or the beginning of the month to start eating right.

If it takes 21 days for a new habit to be formed, NOW is as crucial as ever. Although I woke up disappointed for various reason, I can't allow myself to remain disappointed for too long. NOW, not tomorrow, not next week, NOW is the time to take an honest assessment, shake off the disappointment and keep it moving.

"There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit."

Romans 8:1 shares a great promise to those who are in Christ. Now to just STOP walking according to my flesh...self-control in every area...

Every day that we wallow in what we didn't do yesterday is throwing God's gift of today back in His face! 

TODAY is what we have. Shake of the habits that keep you bound in disappointment and GO FORTH in the gifts of grace and mercy that we receive with each new day! 

Dramas: Loving Me & The Things I Hate About Me

I hate that I'm the one to always reach out...

...that I seem to love harder than ppl seem 2 love me...

...that my heart is as big and as open as it is...and that I can't help but show it...

...that I cry over the sunrise and Kleenex commercials...

...that I am either hot or cold...

...that there is no gray area...

...that I am so expressive...

...that I oftentimes want more for others than they want for themselves...

...that I find it easier to encourage/support others more than I encourage/support myself...

...that I...

...that I still struggle with loving the things I hate about myself.

But because I realize Who created me, I am learning to love me, and all of the things I hate about me…

…because all of these things, are what make me me.

I understand that my heart is open in a world so easily closed off to the warmth of a full heart...

...that people may not know how to love…

…that maybe I can show them how…

...that God gave me arms for reaching…especially for those who pull away…

...that it's my responsibility to teach people how to love me...

…that sometimes, people want more for me than I want for myself…

…that people know they can count on me for encouragement and support…

…I am learning to love me…in spite of me.

To love me just as God created me to be.

#NaturalHair - The New Bougie

Note:  If you would prefer to view the vlog based on this same topic, please see the video below! ;-)

I have recently had mixed emotions about the sudden "trend" of sisters wearing natural hair as I have worn my hair natural for the majority of my adult life after completing my first "big chop" when I was 15 years old -- before there was ever a big chop to be had.

With recent popularity, I found that I began to take a somewhat elitist stance on natural hair, making me no better than the sisters who choose to go natural or even rock a "bald head" because it's the current "in" thing to do. I was no better than the hair care/beauty industries, magazines and advertisers who are riding this new wave to capitalize on the trend.  

I had to take a step back and realize that, from pop culture to politics, sometimes it takes a trend or a "fad" to generate change in the hearts of even one person and in turn, that one person can be the spark that revolutionizes the world.

So, who am I to keep the trend from growing into a true way of life?

As I've grown as a woman and a “naturalista”, I am dedicated to not only sharing with sisters the truth that "good hair is healthy hair" and that natural hair is healthier hair but that living a healthy lifestyle overall enhances our beauty in ways that go well beyond the way we wear our hair.

I’m no “natural hair Nazi” who feels that all women should wear natural hair. My concern is for sisters who feel they can’t wear natural hair and be beautiful; those who feel their hair has to be “relaxed” to be “good”. My issue is the same for sisters who feel they have to wear make-up, weave, false lashes…

But this isn’t about them right now…

This is about us. This is about those of us who have somehow managed to “recondition” our minds to understand that we don’t have to maintain societal standards of beauty. This is about our position and the power that we have to encourage those sisters who are still growing in their hair journey.

How dare we take an elitist stance on something that many of us struggled with ourselves? Many not so long ago…

Most of us were raised by generations of women who depended on lye, weaves and wigs to fit into European standards of beauty. As sisters attempt to renew their thinking, they should not feel alienated because they haven’t “arrived” to where you are in your natural hair revolution!

As with any other area of life, growth and revelation are an ongoing process. For those of us who have found comfort and confidence in our own natural texture of hair, we should be encouraging our sisters in every way possible to feel beautiful, regardless of their current position in life.

                                                                                          

We don’t want sisters to fail to see all of the benefits and beauty that comes with being natural. We don’t want our lifestyle to not be received, or even considered, because of an uppity, belittling attitude towards those who are still growing with us. As with anything, presentation is everything.

***Quick sidenote/example: I hate math. Always have and I’m certain I always will. Regardless of how I feel about the subject, math was an important part of my intellectual, scholastic and social development.

As much as I disliked math, I wasn’t a total failure at because every so often, I would be assigned to a teacher who was willing to be patient and work with my non-mathematical mind, presenting equations and formulas in a way that I would understand and receive. Their angle made the difference. Many were able to make it so that I actually enjoyed the class! Who would have ever thought...?

So, bottom line: Get over yourself. In all things you do, seek to inspire others to be their best and to recognize the beauty that was planted within them when they were created. Sisters have it hard enough without us tearing one another down.

May the trend continue to grow and may the revolution begin with you! To my sisters considering going natural, welcome to the club! Don't stop til you get enough! *cues MJ*

Dining with Bevy: Life with Vision feat. Bevy Smith

Note: Some prefer the book and others prefer the movie. At BE{AM} INSPIRED, I provide both to meet you where you are! Readers and viewers alike, enjoy!

I’m a believer in the idea that nothing happens by chance. As we walk according to a pre-destined purpose, opportunities are presented to us and from there, it’s our responsibility to either take hold of such possibilities or pass them by. 

I too have been guilty of “missing the boat”, failing to walk through open doors due to a variety of made up inadequacies, lack of funding and unfortunately, blatant lack of preparation.

But here I am. Proud to finally be at a point in my life when, not only am I confident in who God has created me to be, but I am prepared to walk according to the vision that He placed in me so long ago.

This past weekend I was invited to attend 'Dining with Bevy: Life with Purpose', an exclusive brunch hosted by Bevy Smith - socialista, fashionista and SO much more! Beyond her work as a host for top music/fashion industry red carpet events, Auntie Bevy, as she is affectionately called in her Twitter world, is a woman dedicated to inspiring others to believe in themselves and the power that lies within waiting to be activated to in turn, inspire the world!

 Upon entering the ‘mocktail’ reception at Bernardin's Fine Dining in Charlotte, Bevy puts her eyes on you, making you feel as if you’re the most important person in the room! Immediately excusing herself from conversations at hand, she takes the time to greet every individual as they walk to the door while effortlessly engaging others in conversation in between the arrival of her hand-selected guests.

After being ushered into the beautiful main dining room at Bernardin’s, the brunch is called to order by Bevy’s own lovely hands, elegantly tapping an empty wine glass holding a small tea candle; nice touch Bernardin’s! *wink*

Having gathered everyone’s attention, she begins by assuring us that, "everyone here is qualified..." 

Throughout the process of growing towards my destiny, I’ve learned this truth over and over again as God convinced me about two years ago that wherever He sends me - be it amongst celebrities, pastors, politicians, those with multiple degrees, whatever the case - He has qualified me to be wherever He sends me.

WARNING: "People will often give you the side eye (as if you don't belong here) but don't let that deter you." - Bevy Smith

Too many people go through life thinking that because they’re from Smalltown, USA or because they have no higher education or come from a less than well-to-do family, that the visions, dreams and aspirations within them aren’t worthy of pursuing. 

Again, Bevy encouraged everyone to believe that "You don't have to "get" somewhere to do something…" Reminding us that there are plenty of people who were born and raised in big cities, or who have families that provide them with every opportunity to succeed, who lack ambition and motivation. Where you’re from has no warrant once you finally get sight of where you’re going.  

I tell my friends/followers in my social media world to 'Always #ChoosePeace'! Peace of mind can't be but, but is a choice that we make every day of our lives. Bevy made a decision to always seek 'tranquility, serenity and clarity' and has found that while seeking these things, she is able to sort through the noise,  mess and naysayers when it comes to business, love and life and general. 

If we would seek the intangible, we'd be that much more prepared to receive our tangible desires when they come along. Bevy reiterated many of the lessons I have learned in life and try to instill in my viewers/readers.

A few more of my favorite Bevy quotes from the day:

The Incomparable Bevy Smith and I

"Everything we do should be reciprocal.” The laws of sowing and reaping do apply, whether you’re consciously sowing or not. This is why it is imperative that we be mindful of where we sow our seeds!

"I actually achieved my goals in TV and as a writer. I was broke but fulfilled. I was still successful because I was doing what I set out to do."

“There is equity in relationships! It's time to start cashing in on the equity that is in the relationships you've been building!”

I am grateful for the lessons learned from Bevy sharing her life and journey with us. I am also grateful for the opportunity to meet so many fabulous people who are looking to stand on ambition and  take the opportunities afforded them! 

On ambition, Bevy reminded us, “when you're given an opportunity, assess it, but don't be afraid to take it!" Determine that fear and uncertainty will no longer hold you back from your purpose and vision!

CJ South aka @creativejenius

Sasha aka @naturalhighco of The Natural High Blog

Six Ways to Receive Your Harvest (Pastor Isaac Pitre of Christ Nations Church, Texarkana, TX)

I had to revisit this from last year! The Word of God stays TRUE!

I declare: From this day on, I walk in revelation knowledge of the Word.

First of all, we cannot stay at home and reap. Just like a farmer cannot sow from sitting around doing nothing, neither shall he receive a harvest without action! Psalm 6:6-9 speaks to the life of the sluggard and shows us the truth that poverty will fall upon those who are unwilling to work.

With that being said, we must truly gain an understanding of this truth: 

EVERY time we give, it IS given back to us! If we don't discern how we're receiving it, we will MISS the harvest!

1) Unexpected Income - We all like the idea of receiving random, unexpected money in the mail, but this is actually the LEAST of the harvest...however, it is VERY possible (I'm a witness!)

2) Favor - God speaking to somebody to do you good! Don't miss your favor! If you are a giver, SOMEBODY around you is trying to favor you! FOLLOW THE FAVOR!

The key to this is also one of the GREATEST areas of harvest that we can receive. If we don't have relationships with PEOPLE, how can God use others to extend His favor? We have to be in a position to receive and that always begins with our attitudes towards others.

3) Relationships and CONNECTIONS - Again, your harvest is in the hands of PEOPLE! If you don't discern your relationships...YOU'LL MISS YOUR HARVEST. 

4) Opportunities - Open doors. When a GOD ORDAINED DOOR OPENS, WALK IN IT! 

5) Ideas, Visions, Dreams and Plans - God will continue to bless us with ideas that can be used to build up the Kingdom. When we sow, God sees our level of spiritual maturity and sees that once we are obedient with a little.

6) Divine Obedience to Assignments - Give into the Kingdom! Whatever you give, YOU WILL PROSPER!

We so often miss our harvest because it comes in unexpected "packages". If you sow, ALWAYS look to receive your harvest! As with all things, practice discernment so you don't MISS IT!?

Another word from Pastor Pitre: 'Be Seated'

Positivity: Muting the Case of the Mondays

So, as I build my life as a writer and speaker, I work full-time as an "Assistant Production Coordinator" for a production company here in Hampton. In other words, I'm a receptionist. :-)

Some wouldn't think this job very glamorous, and they'd think right but I must say, I love my job and the people I work with. Besides having the freedom to write and work on my creative life freely, I am constantly supporting a company and individuals who work directly with the likes of Harpo Productions, Discovery Communications and Sony Records to name a few.

In other words, I'm cool by association, even as a measly receptionist.

Truth is, I have over 10 years of experience in administrative support and my heart for serving people helps me to keep things in perspective when I think about the careers that my peers have as full-time artists, educators, etc...

Over the years, God has shown me that my position, wherever I am, goes well beyond answering phones, keeping the calendars of executives and distributing mail. I have embraced my position recognizing the opportunity that I have daily to enhance the lives of those I work with. By simply being ME I am able to meet simple needs of stressed out producers, editors and researchers both in house and around the country.

Prime example: When I answer the phone at work declare, "Happy Monday! Thank you for calling...this is Nina. How may I help you?" *BEAM*

"Happy Monday!" normally catches people off guard. After giving pause, many callers express their appreciation for my enthusiasm!

Every day I seek to make someone's day brighter in whatever way I can, even if that means helping them to get over their "case of the Mondays"! Those who question my energy on Mondays will see that if they call on Tuesday, Wednesday or any other day, I generally share this same energy every morning even though I'm not a "morning person".

My thinking: Why be miserable JUST because it's Monday?

Monday is just ONE of seven days that we get and is a day wasted if we allow it to be. So, we've been told that THIS is how we are to treat Mondays...or how we should let it treat us. Mondays are a part of time which is continuous & out of our control. What we DO with this time is up to us!

How we FEEL about time, in this case, Mondays, is up to US! So, with that being said, HAPPY MONDAY!

Make the most out of every day that you're blessed to live and every task given to your hands!

BE{AM} BE inspired as iAM inspired! #iShineYouShine

6 Day Detox Drop - Smoothie Recipes

Vanilla Blue – Breakfast

½ cup crushed ice (optional)

1 scoop or 4TBSP vanilla protein powder

1 cup frozen or fresh blueberries

1 small banana, sliced

6-8 oz distilled water

Pomegranate Blend – Lunch

½ cup crushed ice (optional)

1 cup frozen or fresh strawberries

1 cup frozen or fresh blueberries

½ cup unsweetened pomegranate juice

1 scoop or 4 TBSP vanilla protein powder

Misty Red – Dinner               

½ cup crushed ice (optional)

2 cup frozen or fresh strawberries

½ cup organic unsweetened orange juice

1 scoop or 4 TBSP vanilla protein powder

Other Smoothie Options

Hawaiian Breeze

½ cup frozen or fresh pineapple chunks

1 small banana

1 scoop or 4 TBSP vanilla protein powder

½ cup original Silk soy milk or non-fat milk (I prefer Rice milk)

¼ cup organic unsweetened orange juice

Soy Smoothie

¾ cup original Silk soy milk or non-fat milk

½ cup fresh or frozen pineapple chunks

½ bananas fresh or frozen

½ scoop or 2 TBSP of vanilla protein powder

Summer Chill Smoothie

1 scoop or 4 TBSP vanilla protein powder

1 cup peeled and seedless red watermelon, cut (fresh or frozen)

¾ cup fresh or frozen blueberries

2 tsp finely chopped fresh ginger

¾ cup distilled water

¾ cup organic unsweetened apple juice

1 TBSP lime juice

Do's of the 6 Day Detox Drop

1.    DO follow through with the Cleansing Ritual twice daily on an empty stomach at least 30 minutes prior to food.  Note: If you get nauseated after the Cleansing Ritual, you may be one of the rare individuals who needs to have something in their stomach prior to the ritual.  If this is the case, eat breakfast first – wait an hour and then do the Cleansing Ritual.

2.       DO drink at least two quarts of distilled water daily

  

DO GET MOVING!!!